Stamina

Why I call him stamina? Far from what you think. So I work out a lot. Ok I am a gym rat, let’s cut the crap. I am in the gym on average 3 to 4 days a week and I work like I am possessed by demons. I also generally run 10km every Saturday morning when I am not hung-over, or it’s not raining outside which is about 3 Saturdays per month on average. We’ll discuss that another day. Yeah it’s really a conversation you and I should have. In my head anyways.

Stamina Stamina Stamina. The nickname came about because of my gym regimen. Let’s just say right, I noticed around May of this year that a new tall guy came into my gym. From looking at him, he wasn’t new to the gym business, but I had a boyfriend –“Ibadan” at the time, so I didn’t stare too hard. And Ibadan was handling business if you know what I mean.

Any hoots toot to boot, my general regimen for the 4 days I go to the gym is 30 mins running to get in about 4.5km, then 20 minutes on the cross trainer, and then about 6 sets of different weights to get me “bawdied” – it can be weights for my arms, weights with squats etc and about 250 sit up crunches variety. I am in there for about 1.5 hours average if I don’t spend half the time yawning. Let me paint you the picture, I wear Nike tights and nice almost form fitting t-shirts, I like to think I make Nike look like a brand name for exercise porn stars. I generally come in, stretch bring up my legs etc. I stopped giving a damn who watches a long time ago. I reckon I just need to finish and go home to sleep. I have PTSD & Insomnia, I used to work in Baghdad, so I am like half crazy and I don’t sleep till 2am if I don’t tire my ass from working out. Sex isn’t enough to tire me out. I figured that already.

I guess “stamina” had been watching me all along for a few weeks. He actually came to the gym with Ibadan’s friend “Uncle B” who I was familiar with. More incentive to behave myself. Anyways my trainer the “midget bulldog” often decides to make me crazy when he thinks I am getting too fat. I think he prides himself in thinking of my body as his canvas that he can paint on. Never give a trainer a free hand, always tell them what you want.

Anyways the midget bulldog decides he wants me to do circuit training that day. It means I run for 3 minutes, then do one rep of 3 different weights. The problem with that is your body is like on an up and down. It’s very stressful, but a beast like me can handle it, since my goal is to be exhausted when I leave the gym anyways. I figure if I can’t handle it, I’ll just pretend to faint. That tends to solve all problems. So I finished my circuits after doing the whole 3 minutes bizness 6 times and doing 6 different weights – 3 sets– 20 times per set, that’s 18 mins and I free run the balance of 12 minutes. I get off ready to do my 20 mins on the cross trainer and someone taps my shoulder, I relax my headphone in my right ear. And dude goes “you must have a lot of stamina to be able to do all that, hi my name is xxxxyz”, I responded "oh ok I’m the bubblegum thug”. For the life of me, I couldn’t remember his name, so in my mind I just called him stamina. He however claims the stamina context wasn’t sexual; it was merely a compliment on how hard I work in the gym.

I know you are wondering how I got to this level of conversation. Well Ibadan broke my heart and almost had me admitted to a mental institution. Ok I exaggerate, I was depressed coos Ibadan maltreated me along the way. By mid-September, Ibadan had proven beyond reasonable doubt that he wasn’t worthy of by “bubblicious & thuggish awesomeness” and I realised his good for nothing ass had nothing good to offer me. Stamina had been absent from the gym since August, but I couldn’t ask Uncle B, and frankly I had issues of my own. One day Stamina shows up in the Gym end of October fully cloth. He was acting like he was a social prefect. The gym was relatively empty, and he came up to me and said hi. I figured since no one was watching; why not give him my number, they had forced me back onto the officially single market anyways. Apparently he had to stay out of the gym cos his appendix ruptured around August, and he couldn’t work out for 3 months. Oddly enough I ignored his calls that first weekend, because I was on multiple dates with Sehnador. Lol. So that’s how Stamina came about into my life and my wet dreams. Do chics have wet dreams? He is like my fantasy. I drunk watsapp’d him and asked if he would be the coffee in my cream 2 weeks later. Lol.

NESTR

The Bubblegum Thug.